I give bad directions...

There it's finally out there...(this is obviously me talking about anything other than what I really want to drone on about...but I've said my peace and will reserve conversations about the 'beloved' for those who care and or know what I'm talking about) for now, I'll speak of directions and my inability to give them.

Today it really hit home, I was attempting to give directions to a friend, to a place that I have been, in a city I have lived in for 35 years and it was as if I rose out my body and was listening to myself give this convoluted mess of directions with these awkward pauses (I know it was because I was calculating which way was left and  right, without doing that 'L' thing with your hand...YOU know what I'm talking about, don't try to deny it), I was embarrassed for myself and yet I could not stop talking, and I realized that Blaine and the majority of my friends were right, I give REALLY bad directions.  WAY too much detail, confusion about left and right (don't you dare judge me), the anxiety that I might get it wrong and send them to an alternate dimension...so stupid I know, but I think it's actually a documented syndrome...i will soon be taking medication for it, you can be sure of that.  But seriously, what the hell, I know of which I speak and yet I could not get to you to where you wanted to go, if my life or yours depended on it. The lesson in all of this...just don't ask and you won't have to be embarrassed for me as I stutter and pause my way through giving you directions to somewhere as simple as downtown.